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Are Our Screens Getting in the Way of Our Kids' Development?

May 27

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We’ve all been there—scrolling through emails or checking social media while our toddler plays nearby. In today’s hyper-connected world, it's easy to feel tethered to our devices. But growing research suggests these habits may have more of an impact on our children than we realize.



A study published in JAMA Pediatrics reviewed 21 studies involving nearly 15,000 families across 10 countries, all focused on kids under the age of five. The findings are eye-opening: even small amounts of parental technology use (PTU) in a child’s presence are linked to subtle but meaningful changes in how that child learns, behaves, and connects with others.


One of the most concerning takeaways? Negative impacts on language development.

Children thrive on back-and-forth interactions—those silly conversations, shared laughs, and moments of curiosity we so often take for granted. These daily exchanges are the foundation for building vocabulary, grammar, and social communication skills. But when a parent is mentally elsewhere—absorbed in a device—those meaningful interactions can drop off significantly. The study found that increased parental technology use (PTU) is associated with lower cognitive and language performance in children, largely due to missed opportunities for language-rich engagement.


This concern is echoed by speech-language pathologists (SLPs). According to ASHA, responsive communication—especially in early childhood—is a key ingredient in building a child’s speech and language abilities. When screen time (both for adults and children) displaces those moments, it can lead to gaps in vocabulary, sentence structure, and conversational skills. In fact, a review of 42 studies published between 2007 and 2022 found that excessive screen time was negatively associated with language outcomes in more than 70% of the research. This includes reduced expressive and receptive language skills, fewer conversational turns, and limited opportunities to practice verbal and nonverbal communication.


But the impact doesn’t stop at vocabulary. Social behavior is also affected. Kids whose parents frequently use devices around them tend to show more internalizing behaviors like anxiety and withdrawal, as well as externalizing behaviors such as aggression or acting out. They may also be less likely to engage in prosocial behaviors—things like sharing, helping, or showing empathy. On top of that, these children often have weaker attachments to their caregivers, which can influence their emotional security and future relationships.


This pattern, sometimes called “technoference,” highlights how even brief digital distractions can interfere with the quality of parent-child interaction. While the research emphasizes that the effects are small, they’re also consistent—and over time, that can add up. ASHA’s experts stress that it’s not about being screen-free but about being screen-smart: prioritizing responsive, engaged interactions and reducing distractions during high-quality family time.


So how much screen time is okay for parents? The truth is, it's not about eliminating device use altogether—it's about being intentional with when and how we use them. Experts suggest that saving personal screen time for moments when your child is napping, in bed, or engaged in independent play is a great start. It’s also okay for children to see their parents use technology—after all, digital tools are part of modern life. What matters most is context and balance. Occasional phone use during the day, especially for essential tasks, isn’t likely to cause harm. But if devices regularly interrupt your responsiveness, conversation, or shared activities, it can impact your child’s social and language development.


The key is modeling healthy habits: showing your child how technology can be used constructively—like video calling a relative, playing an educational game together, or researching a fun project—while also prioritizing plenty of screen-free, face-to-face interaction.


So what can we do? It doesn’t mean we have to toss our phones out the window. But carving out dedicated screen-free time—especially during meals, bedtime, or play—can make a big difference. Try making eye contact, asking open-ended questions, and really tuning in. These small shifts help foster the kind of rich interaction that supports a child’s language skills, emotional growth, and sense of connection.


The takeaway? Our presence matters. Kids don’t just need us nearby—they need us engaged. And sometimes, the best thing we can do is put the phone down and just be there.


Feeling curious about your own screen habits?Take a moment to reflect: When are you most likely to use your phone around your child? Are there pockets of time during the day when more focused connection is possible? If you’re unsure where to start or want more support, consider reaching out to a certified speech-language pathologist (SLP) or a parent coach. They can help you better understand how your habits might be impacting your child’s development—and offer simple, practical strategies to strengthen communication and connection at home.


Your awareness is powerful. The smallest changes can lead to meaningful growth—for you and your child.


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